About the Book
“This book is a radical teaching! It bears the scratches of that very unique someone who has gone first. A real leader (or teacher) is a person who points us back into our hearts: this work inspires and provides ‘the beats.’ Divine learning is had in the reading of Troy‘s book, and it is a lullaby for the soul. Not to lull us into sleep but rather awaken us to our inevitable potential.”
— Troy Turi (Yoga Teacher & Writer – Vancouver, Canada)
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NEXT WEEK
🌞Rise Up Morning Retreat!🌞
In-studio & Online!!!
Looking for a retreat? Re-centering? Reset? Grounding? - you don’t have to go all that far.
There is an undeniable power to practicing first thing in the morning and stepping out of your comfort zone.
Our minds are clearer, the body longs to move, and our hearts haven't yet been clouded by the constant go go go of daily living.
Join me for this 6AM retreat in studio and online. Every Morning we will begin together with a 60 minute all-level asana (vinyasa) practice then savasana and close your practice if work and life calls, OR I’ll lead you into a pranayama (breathing) practice.
🗓️Monday to Friday May 22nd - 26th
Cost: Members $299 / Non-members $340 - inclusive of full retreat.
⏰ 6am - 730 am
Pre-registration necessary in studio - Unfortunately this retreat is not available for drop-in attendance!
To participate online go to beyondyogatv.com - shop
Online purchase at beyondyogatv.com with lifetime access to classes.
Click the Link in our Bio to register or Contact us today at 351-9642 and [email protected]
Deadline to sign up May 20th.
Recently I've found myself on the podcast train as a podcast guest in an effort to spread a message, grow my audience, and get ready for the launch of my first book.
I have guested on over forty shows in the last few months, connected with beautiful people from all over the world, and begun some epic friendships. Each conversation thought provoking, inspiring, and moving in it's own unique way.
I wasn't sure how I would promote every show and episode that dropped and give them all the exposure they deserved - but finally found a way to have them all on one player @ troyhadeed.com.
You can listen to almost every interview and podcast I've been on with new ones being added every week as they are released - & as I continue to embrace this podcast tour.
Check it out - LINK IN BIO
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A big shout ouT to all Podcasts host who put in immense effort and energy to give others a voice and a platform to share their story and insights.
LOVE
I’m 42, have only been drunk on love, and have lived the vast majority of my life sober. I’m not the soldier who crossed over to the deep end, got lost in the bottle, and found their way back; that’s courage & strength I only attempt to understand. The challenge of sobriety for me is the isolation I sometimes feel, even when standing next to you.
I’ve spent weeks trying to find the words for this post because there is so much to say & lots of room for misinterpretation; I decided to be as direct as possible.
This is NOT an ‘anti-alcohol’ / ‘anti-substance’ / ‘anti-society’ post - this is a ‘PRO-YOU’ post.
We live in a society where alcohol is a pillar of social life, but the list of mood-altering substances commonly used & accepted is continuously growing. - It is not my place to condemn any of it and ‘substance use’ isn’t all ‘bad,’ - but there is a thin line between anything being ‘medicine or poison’.
The truth is, I understand. We juggle mountains of responsibilities, navigate expectations, live lifestyles that gut us from the inside out, and chase superficial ideas of happiness. Then as social anxiety skyrockets, we carry robots in our pockets that steal our attention and make us feel that we should be somewhere else, doing something else, or be someone else. The desire to escape is understandable, at times, necessary.
With that said, after decades of observing & being surrounded by substance use, I can safely say, “I love you either way, but I like you far more when you're sober. Furthermore, I miss you when you're not.”
You carry an underlying vibration & essence, a pulse that contributes something unique to this world and those arround you (To my life). When under the influence, there is a point when that pulse begins to fade and leaves what I can only describe as an echo of your momentary absence. An echo that can sometimes be felt days after.
This doesn’t mean that you should avoid me if you are under the influence (or anyone else who is sober); please don’t, that would be heart-breaking. Just know that I don’t need you to be anyone else, I love you as you are and will always be here waiting eagerly for your pulse to return.
- God would rather be loved, not feared. -
I was recently asked if the tattoo on the top of my hand was a reminder that God was watching me; so I wouldn’t do things that were displeasing to God. - It took me a moment to wrap my head around the question.
I explained that ‘GOD’ tattooed on the top of my hand, was a reminder that Divinity lives in every human being, all aspects of creation, even in what appears as the dark aspects of our world. It is a reminder not that God is watching but that God is right there in every experience; it is a call to acknowledge ‘God’ and act accordingly.
I share this story because the age-old narrative of fearing God has carried on for far too long.
I don’t believe you can truly love someone you are afraid of, unless of course, your definition of love is conditional and toxic. Any relationship governed by fear would lack intimacy, breed inauthenticity, and it would be impossible to truly know someone or allow them to know you. Imagine that your friend, partner, or spouse was doing everything that made you happy and lit your heart on fire, but then you discovered they did these things not because they loved you but because they were afraid of your reaction if they didn’t. How would that feel to you? How is our relationship with God any different?
Consider that whatever divine agency or intelligence you relate to, call that God or some other name; doesn’t have ego or identity issues, and doesn’t use manipulation or intimidation to influence us. God wants to know us intimately - not at a distance. God would rather be loved than feared, and you cannot love someone you are afraid of. But again, that depends on your definition of love.
I often wonder if we missed the point when told we were made in the image & likeness of God. Instead of transcending all the egotistical, low-vibrational ways of being and elevating human consciousness to that of divine beings, we may have just painted God with conditional human emotions & qualities.
Ps. I love you; if this idea challenges previously held beliefs and meets intense resistance, just consider it food for thought.
We have all been conditioned, and it began from the day we were born. We were given a name and led to believe that we were separate from everything and everyone around us. We believed it.
Then we were ushered into belief systems, religions, global perspectives, lifestyles, and even careers. We were taught right from wrong, told what our lives should look like, and molded into carbon copies of previous generations. Over time we may discover and adopt ideologies that challenge our previous conditioning and bring us to realize the narratives we were told aren’t true; they were just socially accepted by some and never challenged.
This discovery is, by all means, a win for human evolution; however, it’s essential to acknowledge that even the movements we currently identify with, which aim to dissolve previous social narratives and dismantle systemic misalignments, carry their own conditioning.
To glimpse freedom, we must continue to question everything we believe and seek to understand where it came from and why we have chosen to believe it. Only in ongoing questioning and introspection can we discover our authentic truth; otherwise, we are simply puppets to someone else’s narrative or have been shackled by our previous ideas of who we thought we were.
Question your programming, reprogram if necessary, and when you think you have it dialed in and figured out, it could be time for a complete software upgrade.
#yoga #life #love #troyhadeed #emotionalintelligence #trinidadandtobago #popcorninmypocket #authorlife #caribbeanwriters #conditioning #questioning #truth #authentic #puppet #livingyoga #yogatrinidad #gaiatv #god #spirit #humanevolution #yamatalent
If ANGER is an emotion, it’s a secondary emotion; something is beneath the anger. It is a response to other ‘negative’ emotions we haven’t acknowledged, can’t express, or have no method of regulating. We all experience anger at some point & often feel it is justified, but if we aren’t in relationship to that anger we become emotionally reactive and overcome with a self-centered sense of identity.
If we authentically try to understand anger and ask ourselves why we are angry, we discover that our anger is rooted in any combination of sadness, hurt, disappointment, pain, neglect, & fear. Our conditioning leads us to believe that anger is the 'go-to' response when we feel wronged, hurt, threatened, or disappointed. Many of us have never been given the tools to process & regulate 'negative' emotions or the space to express them authentically without being judged or alienated.
Rather than communicate our feelings and risk vulnerability, it’s easier to put up walls and be angry; it’s all we know, and we have seen our families and social circles do it for decades.
However, taking time to authentically understand how & what we are feeling, then expressing that through honest and vulnerable conversation, usually reveals there wasn’t anything to be angry about and saves us the pointless drama and emotional warfare.
With this said, it is essential to note that we can be courageous, fierce and stand our ground without being governed by anger. Actually, it is necessary to be fierce and firm at times if we desire to create change or facilitate growth within our relationships, but this does not require or justify anger. We can hold different opinions, push different agendas, and face one another on the battlefield without anger. You see, what anger fails to acknowledge is our conditioning and interconnectedness; it perceives everyone as separate and everything as an intentional & personal attack, which it isn’t - that’s another conversation.
For now, be aware of your emotions and be honest with yourself and what you are feeling; chances are that there is something significant beneath the anger.
📸 @ayannacezanne for the mid chew angry shot.
I can take this one in a few directions but let’s keep it simple. We are all here to learn specific things, if we had it all figured out, we probably would not be in a physical body.
For us to learn, we have to go through the curriculum, and each one of us has a different curriculum to navigate. This means we will experience loss, hurt, betrayal, pain, and even suffering; Sometimes at the hands of the people we love and admire most. There are times when we will be wronged, and times when we will be the wrongdoers. We will not always know better, and even when we do, it doesn’t mean we will always act accordingly.
Then there are moments when we will be blinded by our privileged, our narratives, and our sense of entitlement, while other times when we may be scared by our experiences and conditioning.
If our curriculum involves learning understanding, forgiveness, compassion, resilience, faith and love; then we will not only experience situations that give us the opportunity to learn these things but we will also need to know ingorance, pain, failure, humility, patience, guilt, shame, and defeat. Sometimes we will need to be broken so we can be rebuilt, and help rebuild others as well.
With all of this said, not only are we here to learn and go through the curriculum but so is everyone else. This means that we are part of their curriculum, and much of the time, our mistakes, shortcomings, hurt and pain are not only about our growth, but we are setting the stage for the growth of others as well.
Our approach towards the mistakes and ‘wrongdoing’ of others often involves all this anger, resentment, and talk of revenge' and karmic payback. While the misalignments of our society must be highlighted and addressed so we can learn from then, we should also approach mistakes and wrongdoing with honor and resepct; there is something for us to learn besides our desire to impart punishment and judgment on ourselves or others.
What brought me out of the darkness on day 3? Still landing, this post can’t even glimpse it, but I’ll try.
The voice of the mind is concerned with our identity & place in the world, the intuition of the heart is where God speaks to us. When immersed in uncomfortable situations, our identity can feel threatened, & the mind spirals into fear & anxiety. A pattern I’m familiar with, but adding darkness to the mix was beyond what I imagined & brought rise to a darkness within me that was heavier than I had ever felt.
I prayed it would end, that time would disappear, & I would walk out victorious on day 10. Meanwhile, many of my loved ones prayed that God would give me whatever Insight I needed and get me out of there ASAP. - I believe he did exactly that.
On night 3, a dream guided me to my pranayama practice (breathwork). Later that morning, amidst a spiral of fear, I got to my mat. During that practice, my mind went silent, and my heart came through strong - it led me to leave the room & there was no questioning it.
A lot happened in those 3 days & it’ll take time to process, but I want to mention the ongoing fear of disappointing my community; that walking out early would mean I wasn’t strong enough & would let people down. That was my Ego keeping me in the room, and I realized it was my Ego that led me to the darkness in the first place—chasing an experience, longing to glimpse something I could share with everyone, something that may set me apart. - Thing is, I don’t want to be apart.
Our Egos infiltrate the journey of ‘realization,’ and we obsess with practices & experiences. We sit in silence/darkness for 10 days, meditate, study scriptures, seek psychedelic experiences, and partake in rituals. The mind makes us believe this is ‘the work/the path’ - None of it represents or is a sign of spiritual advancement.
There is no measure of spiritual ‘awakening/enlightenment’ other than seeing & serving God in the eyes of every human being, without exception. We say there are many paths to God, but there is only one; it may look different, but there is only one path, and that path is LOVE.
That’s all. It’s really simple. Lose yourself in Love.
I know some of you are eager to hear about all that I took away from the darkness in 3 days. I didn’t stay 10 days as intended, but I stayed long enough and was gifted what I needed. You’re gonna have to wait for details though. For now I leave you with this nugget.
“There is always light in the darkness, sometimes we just don’t sit in the dark long enough to see it, or maybe it came in a different color or shade than we hoped.”
#yoga #life #love #troyhadeed #trinidad #yogatrinidad #caribbeanwriters #popcorninmypocket #livingyoga #authorlife #darkness #light #breathe #gaiatv #yamatalent #faith #prayer #trinidadandtobago
#spirit #God #beyondyogatv #santosha #nosuchthingasdarkness
#authorlife #caribbeanauthor
Who am I? Sometimes I think I know, but the truth is that I’m pretty clueless. This photo by @___laurastevens___ recently showed me parts of myself I had never before seen. Tonight I embark on a journey of 10 solitary days in complete physical darkness to see if there is any more of me hiding behind the noise of our world. Why?
Not a short answer, but consider everything we believe ourselves to be is in relation to the external world. Our physical body, opinions, beliefs, religion, careers, lifestyle, role… Everything that defines us as individuals describes how we interact or fit in with the world around us. Furthermore, society places labels and ideologies on us, and we are told this is who we are; for the most part, we believe it. We claim ourselves to be many things; white, black, gay, straight, male, mother, catholic, hard-working, honest, republican...etc. But without any point of reference to draw comparison, these things don’t even exist. If we seek to know who we are, it would make sense to remove the external world & go inside. Who are we then?
While I cherish & appreciate the human experience in all its glory, I can’t accept that we are merely physical beings in a physical world. Beneath the physical, everyone and everything is Spirit. And believe it or not, that Spirit came out of the darkness before bringing forth light. We often think of darkness as ‘evil or bad,’ but consider that darkness is the womb of creation. Before there was light, all was one within the epic void of nothingness; light was born out of the darkness.
It is with eager hesitation & humility that I surrender myself & all that I believe myself to be.
I have no idea who or what I am going to encounter in the darkness, but I do know that I will meet my mind in all its glory, be called to tame my ego, and come heart to heart with God, maybe even glimpse just one of his million faces. One thing for sure is that the man who walks out of that room will not be the same one that walked in. The scariest thing about it is that I really love the man that is walking into that room, but I know I will love the man that walks out as well.
See you in the light. Send highest vibrations.
Love
Hope is a beautiful thing, don’t get me wrong, but Hope and Faith are NOT interchangeable. At the elementary level hope implies an element of doubt, anxiety, worry, and is generally directed towards our desires and dreams. Faith is far bigger than hopes and dreams, and also carries an unwavering confidence and knowing.
Let’s drop a pin here and acknowledge that a belief in God or religion is not a prerequisite for anyone to have faith. On the contrary, faith comes first. It is due to one’s faith that we can even entertain the idea of God. In other words, consider that faith is an absolute knowing that we are part of something bigger than ourselves and that there is some force or intelligence guiding us, protecting us, and holding us close, even when we are face down in the mud.
Faith is what picks us up when our hope and dreams have been shattered and nothing appears to be going our way. Having faith is not the belief that we can manifest everything we desire or predict the future, it is understanding that there is an intelligence that dreams bigger than we do and has to consider things we may not yet understand. Faith is willing to risk failure because it understands that is part of the process.
To have faith is to show up with absolute commitment even when it’s hard and uncomfortable. With that said, faith is also having the courage to turn your life around, trust your intuition, and step into the unknown. Faith is bigger than our hopes and dreams, it is that constant whisper throughout all of the human experience that says, “Trust the process, trust the process, trust the process. You may fall, but I got you. Trust the process.”
The world at times can be heavy and appear to be in shambles. Sometimes its hard to see where we are heading or whats gonna come of it all, but Trust The Process. All we got to do is show up, do the best that you can, and trust.
I’ve always seen teacher training as a sacred experience and wanted to be sure I was ready. It took 15+ years of teaching, practice, and study even to consider facilitating the journey for anyone else. I still have no words for what occurred, but I will try.
I didn’t want to simple teach the art of sharing yoga in the form of postures and practices. None of that makes much sense to me if we are not committed to being better humans, getting over ourselves, and embodying a limitless and almost inconceivable love. To use the practice of yoga as a tool to quiet our minds and nurture a unique and intimate relationship with whatever divine agency we relate to, then to see that everywhere.
I wasn’t sure how it would play out, but I was going to give it everything and pray it was enough. We created a space where strangers became family, a space of introspection and inquiry, and a space of vulnerability and courage. On day one, they were thrown into the fire to teach, and on day two, they gazed into one another's souls in uncomfortable silence. After that, all we had to do was show up and trust; the rest was divinely orchestrated magic.
The experience was not only transformational for everyone else, but I was clearly going through my S&#t as well. I decided this would be my last teacher training, then that I would stop teaching yoga altogether, then thought maybe I’d just disappear. That’s when Spirit would move through the room and gently kiss the back of my neck, whispering, “Are you seeing this? Enough with the emotional chatter; Get over yourself; We have work to do.”
Many have asked how it went? Let's just say that I couldn’t have imagined or dreamed this experience up. The tears that streamed down my face at the end of their first class would have been enough, but they dissolved conditioning and narratives, overcame emotional pain, and challenged the very idea of who they thought they were. What more could I hope for?
I’m still processing the experience, but I have been transformed in many ways and would be surprised if any one of us didn’t feel the same.
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